We Need To Teach Our Daughters To Distinguish Between

Dear daughter,

You are a wonderful person and your mother and I think the world of you.  It will not be long before you leave home to make your way in the world.  Can I please give you some friendly advice? 

Here are some things that you should never do.

Advice for a Teenage Daughter – Things You Should Never Do

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10 Things Nothing Else But A Heartbreak Will Teach You

A heartbreak can act as a brake to your sweet fleeting life. And even the inundation of expert advice from your close ones, in such situations, proves ineffective because the one going through hell at that time is you, all alone, right? 

And this short journey through hell ultimately leads you to things that otherwise are “esoteric” (only meant or understood by a special group of people). 

So read on and acquaint yourself with these 10 things that only a heartbreak can teach you.

SPOILER ALERT: If you have previously gone through a heartbreak, you may empathize with the following given points.

1. Relationships cannot survive on love alone.

You might think that love is all you need in a relationship, but ask someone who has been rejected or heartbroken. Love is not the only key for a good relationship; there are various aspects to it. You might have heard people saying, “we both love each other so much, yet our relationship is on the rocks” or, “in spite of loving each other, we have decided on a mutual break-up.” Such statements might have confused you, but a person who has gone through a heartbreak very well understands it. A heartbreak will practically throw you out of your dreamy zone and familiarize you with reality.

2. Heartbreak is not just a metaphor.

Until you really witness the ordeal of a Heartbreak, you can only mock or sympathize with the people going through it. A heartbreak can only teach you that physical pain is not the worst kind of pain in the world; “heartbreak”is, because it isn’t just psychological—it’s physical as well.

“There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.” —Laurell K. Hamilton

3. Feelings are untrustworthy.

Feelings are like vortex of emotions; they draw everything that surrounds them toward the center, sometimes engulfing your own life. So to trust on your feelings completely is not at all safe. And a heartbreak can very well teach you that. It can make you understand that your feelings are mere perceptions experienced by your body for particular situations. The feelings which once made you strong and steady can also make you weak and fragile and vice versa. So a crucial lesson a heartbreak can teach you is to judge people by their actions also and not entirely based on your feelings towards them.

4. Some doors are meant to be shut.

A Heartbreak can teach you the most important lesson of life which otherwise is hard to get: “Nothing in life is immortal.” In life, you might often wish that some good things always continue to exist, but you get all perplexed the moment they seem to cease. You must have dedicated some part of your life to making sure that good thing continues existing, but when such a thing gets lost, you are not able to let it go, and there will always a part in you that longs for it, making your life miserable. But only a heartbreak can teach you that it’s better to close some doors as they don’t lead anywhere.

“Sometimes we need to forget some people from our past because of one simple reason: they just don’t belong in our future.” —Anonymous

5. Self-adequacy.

The feeling of self-adequacy is the most important lesson a heartbreak can teach you. Self-adequacy implies that one views oneself as capable of dealing satisfactorily with problems or in the things one sets out to do. Well, before a heartbreak you think that your loved one is the person responsible for your happiness or either you are the one responsible for his problems or vice-versa, but the trauma of a heartbreak can very well make you understand your own competence or ability towards your own happiness. You realize that no one else but you yourself are responsible to either make or break your life.

6. Life still goes on.

“I love you and I’d rather be happy with you, than without you, but with or without you, life still goes on. I’ll be OK.”

The above quoted lines beautifully explain the feelings known to a heartbroken person. Prior to heartbreak, you cannot imagine a life without your loved one. You might feel that life would stop or everything around you will cease if your loved one is not there with you. But a heartbreak can grimly make you realize that time stops for no one and life goes on even when you are not ready.

7. Good and evil are two sides of the same coin.

From past times, it’s been said that good and evil are two sides of the same coin. Though that statement is quite baffling, a person gone through a heartbreak will definitely approve on that. Anyone who has been abandoned or rejected knows how the same person who was so good and caring earlier can become evil and harmful later. Even the idea of loving and hating the same person at one point that seems so weird to most of us, but it is an actual truth for a person who has been through heartbreak.

8. Heartbreak illustrates your weaknesses.

“Some people pass through our lives for a reason to teach us lessons that could never be learned if they stayed.” —Mandy Hale

Yes, heartbreak can in a way prove beneficial to you. It can make you aware of your inner weaknesses. People are not able to accept their faults or become sullen if their weaknesses are pointed out by others. But a heartbreak can surely make you aware of your weak points, in a way giving you an opportunity for self-improvement.

9. Life is unpredictable.

A heartbreak can categorically teach you that surprises are a part of life. Prior to a heartbreak, no matter how much you planned for your future love life, it was all shattered into pieces. You received what was unexpected from life. You were sure about your lover and his or her insights, but what happened later was a violent blow on your predictions.

10. Enlightening love.

Last but not least, a heartbreak can enlighten you more about love than anything else in the world. You understand the complexities invoved with it. And no matter how much it might have hurt you, a heartbreak can never wipe out love from your heart. You don’t lose the power of being loved or to love someone entirely.

“A baby is born with a need to be loved—and never outgrows it.” —Frank A. Clark

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11 Tips That Can Make Anyone A Microsoft Word Expert

Microsoft Office is one of the most popular office suites out there. It’s used by businesses both large and small. There are versions for college students and for home use.

It’s available for both PC and Mac and word around the internet grapevine is that it’ll eventually be made available for some distributions of Linux. Even though most people use it, most people do not use it to its full potential.

Here are 11 awesome tips to make you better at Microsoft Word.

1. See all of the symbols in Microsoft Word

When you type spaces and hit the enter button, you don’t see all that much but that doesn’t mean there isn’t anything there. There are actually symbols and characters all over your Microsoft Word document and you may not even know it. If you want to see all of them, Go to File, then Options, then Display, and select to Always Show These Formatting Marks on the Screen. You can also activate Draft Mode to see what the first doesn’t by going to the View menu and setting it to Draft View.

2. Master the paragraph

You would be surprised just how many ways you can format a paragraph. You can indent the first sentence or you can indent every other line except the first line. What’s more, the paragraph mark (shown above) is actually fairly powerful. It contains information on how each paragraph is formatted which can make them pretty powerful. If you copy a whole paragraph with the paragraph mark, you end up copying the formatting too. If you don’t copy the mark with the paragraph, the paragraph will paste without formatting.

3. Master sections

By using the various breaks in Microsoft Word, you can better organize your documents. The best way to do this is through the use of sections. You can access the breaks menu on the Page Layout menu. Microsoft Office doesn’t see pages as you and I see them. They see sections. If you set your document up in sections, you can format each section independently and give yourself far more control than you normally would if everything were in one section!

4. Use styles

Styles are amazingly powerful. If you create a style template, you can use it over and over again for any document. If you write a lot of memos, you can create a memo style. You can repeat the process for virtually any document type. To see existing styles, to to the Home tab in Word. You can click on the down arrow to create your own. If you write a lot in a similar style, it’s definitely worth turning it into a style so you don’t have to format so much and save yourself some time.

5. Prepare your document before writing

It’s always a good idea to get an idea of your formatting before you actually start filling in the blanks. That way you can format your headers, paragraphs, styles, etc all before you put your document together. Doing so can allow you to alter your document before you make it to make sure that everything fits appropriately. There’s nothing more frustrating than copying and pasting some information and having the formatting be all wrong.

6. Configure your paste options

Believe it or not, you can actually control how Microsoft Office deals with pasting words. This can be attained by clicking on the Office button (the logo at the top left), navigating to Word Options, and then to Advanced. From there you should be able to see a Cut, Copy, and Paste option that will let you configure your options. This can allow you to do things like disable hyperlinking when pasting and other formatting options to make life easier.

7. Use full justification formatting

An often unknown option in Word is the ability to use justification formatting. You can see an example of this above. Essentially, it just means that the left and right margins are perfectly aligned. Word is able to do this by altering the spacing of words in each line so that they line up. This gives documents a professional and formal look. To use this, click the Office logo, then Word Options, and then Advanced. Expand the Layout Options and you can set it there.

8. Hide the ribbon interface

For those who may not know, the ribbon interface is the toolbar that runs along the top of Microsoft Word. Some people enjoy it and others find it distracting and too busy. Thankfully, there is an easy way to get rid of the ribbon. With Word open, click CTRL+F1. The ribbon will disappear. Repeat the process to make it reappear.

10. Remove all formatting

Sometimes you need to blow up the formatting and start over. Formatting can get disorganized and your document can end up looking bad. When this happens it’s probably best to start over from the beginning. To do this, select any bit of text you want to remove the formatting from and click the button as shown in the screenshot above. The formatting will be removed and you will be left with just text.

11. Use the Spike to copy and paste

Spike pasting is actually a lot of fun. Here’s the premise. You cut various words from a document and then you can paste them all together. There isn’t really a specific use-case for this tool but you’ll know when you need it. To use it, use CTRL+F3 to copy. You can do this as many times as you like.

When you paste as usual, it’ll paste everything that you copied using the CTRL+F3 command. This can be useful for collecting snippets of a document and putting them together.

With these tricks and a little practice, you’ll be able to create amazing documents that’ll look professional and clean. In a word place where just knowing how to use Word isn’t enough anymore, these tips can give you a slight edge that’ll make you stand out!

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What Type Of Wine Glass Should You Be Using?

Are you using the right wine glass?
Most people assume that wine glasses come in 3 basic sizes. However, a closer look at this infographic will tell you a completely different story.

Wine glasses were designed to let in the right amount of air to maximize taste and quality.

The problem is that there are many types of wines. Red wine alone can be broken down into 3 types (light, mid and heavy). This is why wine glasses come in so many shapes and sizes.

Additionally, if you don’t know a lot about the wine you are drinking, the type of glass that is given to you can help you distinguish your drink. This method can be very revealing and should be used sparingly.

What’s your favorite wine glass? How has choosing the right glass for your wine helped you appreciate your drink? Share your experience with us.

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7 Simple Things To Do To Differentiate Yourself and Build a Standout Career

According to the International Labor Organization, the global jobs gap is likely to rise to 75 million by 2018 unless there is a significant surge in employment market growth.

This is despite reported labor market growth in the U.S. and UK, however, as developed economies continue to struggle with social, political and financial upheaval.

While this is a negative development, it is worth noting that even a prosperous job market creates unique challenges for job-seekers and individuals who are looking to progress their careers. More specifically, it creates a more crowded and competitive employment market, as a growing number of people resume their search for work and apply for a disproportionate ratio of jobs.

How to Stand Out From the Crowd in the Contemporary Job Market

With this in mind, what simple steps can you take to distinguish yourself from the crowd while establishing a progressive career? Consider the following:

1. Open your Mind to New Career Opportunities

Technological advancement has changed the nature of the modern workplace, while also sounding the death knell for traditional industries such as print media and analogue television. Anyone who is experienced in these industries must therefore develop an open mind if they are to progress, as they consider new opportunities in similar but more progressive market sectors. Why this may force you to acquire some new skills and qualifications, it will enable you to evolve your career and drive it forward from austerity.

2. Try New Things and Embrace the Unknown

While embracing new career opportunities in related and progressive industries will stand you in good stead, you should take this philosophy further and look to sample a series of new skills and experiences as you consider your future. This will encourage you think outside of your existing capabilities, as your future employment may lie in an industry that has little or no connection to your previous experience of the workplace. By showcasing a willingness to learn brand new skills and try different things, you can take your career in a direction that you never thought was possible.

3. Be Proactive Not Reactive in the Marketplace

Whether looking to develop an existing career or start a new one from scratch, you cannot hope to progress unless you adopt a proactive approach to networking, sourcing opportunities and making applications. Those with a reactive mind-set are ill-equipped to thrive in a competitive market, as they will lose ground to their rivals and fail to stand-out as keen or motivated candidates for work. So even if it goes against your nature, consider being tenacious in your approach and changing your behavior with regards to pursuing opportunities.

4. Showcase your Key Personal Attributes

When applying for a new job, it is likely that you and your rival candidates will share many of the same skills and academic qualifications. In this instance, it is often your experience and personal attributes that will distinguish you from the crowd, so you must present these clearly and confidently to potential employers. In essence, these are your unique selling points as an individual candidate, and your ability to market them effectively will determine whether or not you can secure long-term security and the standout career of your dreams.

5. Strive to Cultivate Strong Working Relationships

By sharing your most positive personal attributes in a professional context, you are also laying the foundations for strong working relationships with your employers. The same principle applies when networking with recruiters and industry contacts, despite the prominence of social media and remote communication it is important to remember that the employment market remains an interpersonal environment that is driven by face-to-face interaction. So by presenting your qualities and communicating openly, you can cultivate strong professional relationships that help you to maximize your career.

6. Remember the Value of Hard Work

In an age of digital communication, e-recruitment and online working processes, it is easy to believe that technology is the key player in the contemporary employment market. While it is undoubtedly influential, however, it is important not to underestimate the value of hard work and how this impacts positively on your chances of achieving multiple career goals. Simply by showcasing a willingness to go above and beyond the call of duty and work outside of your contracted hours where necessary, you can distinguish yourself in the eyes of employers and elevate your career to a higher level.

7. Remain Focused on Clearly Defined Career Goals

Historically, individuals always could rely on long-term employment opportunities once they had left education and ventured out into the world of work. This is no longer the case, however, which means that today’s generation of workers must be adaptable and willing to change positions if they are to achieve their career goals.

While your job title, location and level of remuneration may be changeable, however, it is important to retain clearly-defined, long-term career goals that enable you to focus as you look to progress. This will help you to cope with your constantly changing circumstances and the necessary periods of transition.

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10 lessons McRaven learned from basic seal training that will help anyone who wants to change the world.

If I told you making your bed every morning was a good way to change the world, would you believe me?

Early summer always seems to produce an influx of inspirational content on the Internet.

There are commencement speeches being given at universities all over the world, and the Internet always seems to find the best ones.

This one in particular has garnered a lot of attention and for good reason:

1. If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed.

Every morning the seals are required to make their bed to perfection. Why is this important? ”

“If you make your bed every morning, you will have accomplished the first task of the day. It will give you a small sense of pride and encourage you to do another task, and another, and another.

Though it’s a seemingly small task, it has big implications.

“If you can’t do the little things right, you’ll never be able to do the big things right.”

Plus, if your day sucks, you still come home to a made bed.

2. If you want to change the world, find someone to help you paddle.

In basic seal training, students are broken down into boat crews of seven people. Every day they gather on the beach and are instructed to paddle through the surf zone and then several miles down the coast. Each paddle must be synchronized and exert equal effort or the boat will turn and be thrown back by the eight to ten foot waves of the surf. If you try to make it through life on your own, you’ll never make it. Be grateful for those who help and help others in turn.

3. If you want to change the world, measure a person by the size of their heart, not by the size of their flippers.

The best boat crew in McRaven’s class wasn’t the one with the biggest, tallest men. It was a group of diverse men who were no taller tan 5′ 5′. The crew was nicknamed the “Munchkin Crew”. The other students would often make fun of the “teeny tiny” flippers they would put on. However, they always out-paddled, out-ran and out-swam the other boat crews.

“Nothing matters but your will to succeed. Not your color, not your ethnic background, not your education, not your social status.”

4. If you want to change the world, get over being a sugar cookie and keep moving forward.

Uniform inspection happened often in seal training. Students would put excessive effort into starching their hat, pressing their uniform and shining their belt. However, no matter how much effort they put in, the instructors would find something wrong. If you failed inspection, you had to run fully clothed and submerge yourself in the surf zone. Then you had to run onto the beach and roll around in the sand until you were completely covered. The result was appropriately deemed a “sugar cookie”. You had to stay in that uniform the rest of the day. Many of the students couldn’t accept the fact that no matter how hard they tried, they would fail. They didn’t understand the purpose of the drill.

“You were never going to succeed; you were never going to have a perfect uniform – the instructors weren’t going to allow it. Sometimes no matter how well you prepare or preform, you still end up as a sugar cookie. It’s just the way life is sometimes.”

5. If you want to change the world, don’t be afraid of the circuses.

There are certain time requirements students are expected to reach in their daily training. If you fail to reach a time requirement, you are invited to “the circus”. The circus was two extra hours of calisthenics designed to break you down and force you to quit. It meant you would be more tired and have less energy the next day to meet the time requirements – meaning another invite to the circus. However, over time, those students who were in the circus got stronger and stronger. The pain built inner strength and physical resiliency.

“Life is filled with circuses. You will fail. You will likely fail often. It will be painful. It will be discouraging. At times it will test you to your very core.”

6. If you want to change the world, sometimes you have to slide down the obstacles head first.

Twice a week trainees are required to run the obstacle course. The most challenging of the 25 obstacles was the “slide for life”. It was a 30 foot tower at one end and a 10 foot tower at the other. in between was a 200 foot rope. You had to climb the 30 foot tower, grab the rope, swing underneath and pull yourself hand over hand to the other end. The record for the course had stood for years and seemed unbeatable. One day a determined student decided to go down the slide for life head first. Instead of swinging underneath, he bravely mounted the top. It was a risky move. Failure could mean a fall to the ground below and injury. He didn’t let that possibility stop him from trying. Instead of several minutes, it only took half that time. He broke the course record that day.

7. If you want to change the world, don’t back down from the sharks.

One of the required swims the seals had to do was a night swim off the coast of San Clemente. The waters there are filled with all kinds of sharks. Though the students were told no student had been eaten by a shark – that they knew of – they were also taught that if a shark began to circle, to stand their ground. They were not to swim away. If the shark did swim toward them, they had to summon all their strength and punch the shark in the snout, and it would swim away.

8. If you want to change the world, you must be your very best in the darkest moments.

Underwater attacks on enemy ships is practiced often in training. You are dropped outside an enemy harbor and required to swim over two miles, under water, using no more than a depth gauge and a compass. During the approaching swim, there is some visibility from light that shines through the water. However, as you approach the ship, all light becomes blocked by it. To be successful, you have to swim under the ship and find the keel. At that point, it becomes so dark you can’t see your hand in front of your face and the noise from the ship’s machinery is deafening.

“Under the keel, at that darkest moment of the mission, is a time when you need to be calm. When you must be calm. When you must be composed. When all your tactical skills, your physical power, and your inner strength must be brought to bear.”

9. If you want to change the world, start singing when you’re up to your neck in mud.

Hell week is 6 days of no sleep. You are under constant physical and mental harassment. On Wednesday of hell week, they went to the mud flats, an area between San Diego and Tijuana. The mud flats was a swampy patch of terrain where the mud will engulf your whole body. You have to paddle down and spend 15 hours surviving the freezing cold, howling wind and incessant pressure from instructors to quit.

On this day, as the sun was setting, McRaven’s training class had committed some infraction of the rules and was ordered into the freezing mud up to their necks. They still had eight hours of until the sun came up.

Instructors told them if only five men quit – just five – they could get out. It was obvious some students were about to quit. At that time, one of the students started singing with great enthusiasm. One voice turned to two and two into three until everyone was singing. That one voice of song brought hope to the group and a renewed strength to endure.

“If I have learned anything in my time traveling the world, it is the power of hope. The power of one person. A Washington, a Lincoln, King, Mandela, and even a young girl from Pakistan, Malala. One person can change the world by giving people hope.”

10. If you want to change the world, don’t ever, ever ring the bell.

There is a brass bell hanging in the middle of the training compound for everyone to see. If you didn’t want to wake up at five every day, swim in the freezing cold, run for miles, complete the obstacle course or endure any of the hardships of training, all you had to do to quit was ring the bell. It was that easy.

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12 Useful Windows Programs You’ll Want to Download

We’ve come a long way since the DOS days of doing all of our computer tasks manually.

Nowadays, there’s even an Iphone app that sorts our socks for us. So it goes without saying that there are plenty of useful Windows programs- none of
which sort your socks.

Whether you’re a windows veteran or a disgruntled Mac convert, you’ll want to take advantage of the following free and useful Windows programs.

If you’re looking for something to help with organization, productivity, or simply keeping track of things, try these out.

1. Avast!: for the infected

No, I’m not calling you a zombie. However, if you’re computer is badly infected with viruses, it probably won’t be long before its performance starts going south. Avast is a free antivirus and anti-spyware program that will run on Windows 7, 8, Vista, and XP.

2. Comodo Backup: for the losers

Just kidding, you’re not a loser. However, if you lose things often, you may want to think about keeping important files and media in storage. Comodo is like an online hard drive, offering 10 GB of space for free or 100 GB for $7.99 per month. The program runs on Windows systems as old as 2003.

3. WinDirStat

True or false: You have too much stuff running at once and your computer hates you. You’ll be able to find out with WinDirStat, a program that allows you to view your disk usage and clean things up if necessary. You’ll be able to see statistics as well as a visual display of your file types. Bonus points: cool colors.

4. Lastpass: for the forgetful

We’ve all needed Lastpass at one point or another. The program recalls your important passwords by creating browser extensions for Internet Explorer, Firefox, Chrome, Safari, and Opera. Never sit dumbfounded in front of an account login again!

5. Rainmeter: for the wallpaper junkie

Rainmeter is the perfect way to up the aesthetic value of your desktop and organize it at the same time. Thousands of skins are available like the one below. The program allows you to customize your desktop with memory and battery power, email, RSS feeds, weather forecasts, or whatever else you want to keep track of. Plus, they’re fun to build.

6. Defraggler: for the clean freak

I don’t know about you, but just the idea of having “fragments” scattered around my hard drive gives me the immediate urge to clean. Defraggler is your virtual spring cleaning program, sequencing “blocks” of content and freeing up space. It’s especially good to try if your computer has been running slow. Unlike most defragmentation programs, this one allows you to choose specific files instead of the whole drive. Conveniently, you can also schedule the program to run when you’re not at the computer.

7. Ultimate Windows Tweaker: for the customizer

This program will run on Windows 7, 8, XP and Vista, enabling you to “tweak” just about every feature you can imagine. Security, network, display, and other options allow you to set your computer up in the exact way you want it. This is great for those little annoyances you wish you could edit.

8. Breevy: for the timesaver

Breevy is certainly the product of a fast-paced, technological age. No longer do you have to type out full words and phrases that you use often. Just save an abbreviation in Breevy, and from then on you can type the abbreviation to make the full word or phrase appear. It also comes with a typo corrector and syncs with TextExpander (a similar program) via Dropbox.

9. CCleaner: for the hoarder

Ccleaner is similar to Defraggler in cleaning and speeding up your computer. However CCleaner wipes out your Browser’s temporary files, history, cookies, super cookies, and autocomplete form history. Think of CCleaner as the poor guys who have to clean out a hoarder’s house. Think of Defraggler as the interior designers who go in afterwards and trying to make sense of what’s left.

10. XBMC: for the media junkie

XBMC is home theater software that allows you to view movies, shows, and pictures. You can also listen to music, play DVDs, and download an XBMC remote control on your Iphone. The program is open source with a 10 foot user interface (yea, get the popcorn ready). As of recently, you can even watch Netflix and download tons of other addons like weather forecasts, skins, and webscrapers.

11. Virtualbox

Virtualbox is an open source program that enables you to run two operating systems at once. If you’re wondering why on earth you’d need to do that, you’re probably just not nerd enough. It’s useful for testing out new upgrades before installation, playing games, or running programs that are incompatible with your host system. With Virtualbox, you can use Windows as the host or guest system. There’s also a feature called Snapshots that allows you to revert back to a previously saved state.

12. Unlocker

Windows sometimes decides to be incredibly frustrating and not allow you to delete a file. It will often say that the file is being used by an open program, but you might have no idea which one. Unlocker is the solution. Download Unlocker, right click those files, and select “Unlock” to get rid of them. That’s it!



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Why You Should Never Cross Your Arms Again

Body language is older and more innate for us as humans than even language or facial expressions.

That’s why people born blind can perform the same body language expressions as people who can see.

They come pre-programmed with our brains.
I’ve always been incredibly fascinated with body language and how it helps us achieve our goals in life.

The power of body language is probably best described by Amy Cuddy’s famous quote:

“Our nonverbals govern how other people think and feel about us.”

If you are anything like me, then you’ve had a healthy obsession with body language for some time. In recent years, a few fascinating studies at Harvard, Princeton and other top universities shed new light on body language and how to use it at work. So whilst the power of language is extremely important to convey the right message.

The power of body language however, might be the determining factor of how someone makes us feel.

Here is an insight into some of the latest studies on how we can use body language to our advantage in every day life.

Your body expresses emotion better than your face

We all grow up learning how to deal with each other based on facial expressions. And yet, that might not at all be the best way to judge other people’s emotions.

Researchers from Princeton performed a very simple experiment. They asked study participants to judge from photography whether that person is feeling joy, loss, victory or pain. Now some photographs showed facial expressions only, some showed body language and some both.

Have a go yourself at the following picture and try to say whether the tennis player’s faces on the right enjoy victory or loss:

Image credit: Buffer Blog

And the results couldn’t be any more startling:

“In four separate experiments, participants more accurately guessed the pictured emotion based on body language — alone or combined with facial expressions — than on facial context alone.”

Extremely positive and extremely negative emotions are especially hard to distinguish from each other, explains head researcher Todorov.

Now, it gets even more interesting. Body language isn’t just something we have to learn. Most emotional expressions come built into our system. For example, scientists from British Columbia observed congenitally blind people at the Paralympics.

In this example, the left athlete can see, whereas the right athlete is congenitally blind. Yet, after winning, both express the same body language for victory:

Image credit: Buffer Blog

So, if body language is both so ancient and ingrained and also so powerful to express our true emotions, how can we use it better in our every day lives to achieve what we want?

Amy Cuddy from Harvard has answers for us:

Body language changes who you are – literally

In one of my favorite Ted Talks, Amy Cuddy explains some of the most peculiar happenings of body language. Cuddy focuses a lot on the business world and how body language is helpful for us here and the possibilities seem to have no boundaries.

Cuddy distinguishes between 2 different types of body postures. One are powerful poses, and their counter part are powerless ones. Here is an example of a powerful pose:

Image credit: Buffer Blog

And here is an example of a powerless one:

Image credit: Buffer Blog

Now Cuddy’s research reveals a bunch of extremely interesting things. The first is that expressing more powerful poses helps us get better jobs, makes us feel better and makes us overall more successful.

And yet, it goes a lot further than to just change the positing of your legs or arms. Cuddy explains that inside our bodies, actual changes are happening as our body language changes. These changes largely have to do with hormones.

The two hormones in question are:

• Testosterone: The “power” hormone, which amongst lots of other things helps us to be a better leader, have more focus and attention.
• Cortisol: The “stress” hormone, which amongst lost of other things makes us less re-active to stress, makes us feel overwhelmed and powerless.

Here is what Cuddy’s experiment contained:

They brought people into a room. For two minutes, they would either perform a powerful pose or a powerless pose. Then they would go on into performing a job interview. The results were absolutely stunning:

Neutral recruiters, who didn’t know who performed which pose, consistently picked only those that previously performed the powerful poses as people they would want to hire.

On top of that, the actual hormone levels of people changed dramatically. Here is the increase in testosterone and drop in cortisol after performing the power-pose (for just 2 minutes!):

Image credit: Buffer Blog

And here are the hormone levels after performing the powerless-pose, with a significant drop in testosterone and increase in cortisol:

Image credit: Buffer Blog

According to Cuddy, here findings show that changing our body language doesn’t just change our outcomes.

It changes who we are as people. So instead of “faking until you make it”, her advice is:

Fake it until you become it.
Can you fake it until you make it? Yes, here are 5 postures to work on today to answer the question “How can I improve my body language”:

“How can I improve my body language?” – Here are 5 postures to work on

1.) Focus on the position of your feet

Carol Kinsey Goman has researched the importance of body language in the workplace for many years. One of her best tips is to watch your feet. A lot of the time, we focus on our upper body or faces, yet our feet reveal more about our emotions than we might think:

“When you approach 2 people talking, you will be acknowledged in one of two ways. If the feet of your two colleagues stay in place and they twist only their upper torsos in your direction, they don’t really want you to join the conversation. But if their feet open to include you then you know that you are truly invited to participate.”

In another example from her book Goman explains when to know that “conversations are over”:

Whenever you are speaking with a co-worker who seems to be paying attention, and whose upper body is angled toward you, but whose legs and feet have turned toward the door – realize that the conversation is over. Her feet are telling you she wants to leave. Foot positions are revealing even if someone’s legs are crossed.

I’ve started to experiment this at the Buffer office too. Whenever I speak with someone I make sure to give them my full attention – head til toe. So far, it’s been a great experience.

2.) Smile – it’ll make you happier

We smile because we are happy. But does it work the other way around too? Researchers at Cardiff University think so. People who smile, without actually feeling happy, can make themselves feel a lot happier, says Michael Lewis, a co-author of the study:

“It would appear that the way we feel emotions isn’t just restricted to our brain—there are parts of our bodies that help and reinforce the feelings we’re having,”

Of course, being able to smile well is a whole other story. For now, give it a try to smile in the restroom or in another quiet place before a difficult conversation, job interview or meeting. It might just make you more successful.

3.) Practice Amy Cuddy’s “power poses” before important meetings

Amy Cuddy suggests 3 distinct power poses to practice for 2-3 minutes before you have an important conversation.
Try them next time in a quiet place and see if they have the same results for you:
Power-posture 1:

Image credit: Buffer Blog

Power-posture 2:

Image credit: Buffer Blog

Power-posture 3:

Image credit: Buffer Blog

4.) Realign your body more congenially with your conversation partner

Another great tip from Goman mentions that if you try to align yourself more congenially with a conversation partner you will be able to solve tension in conversations and come to solutions more quickly:

“If you physically align yourself with that person (sitting or standing shoulder to shoulder facing the same direction), you will defuse the situation. “

I’ve found this especially true with meeting people you’ve never met before. It’s hard to build rapport at the start, focusing on aligning can make a big difference. Give it a try.

5.) Lower your voice with deep breathing

Although not a specific tip for body posture, this is one of my favorite tips. Men and women with deeper voices are more likely to land in leadership positions and are generally perceived as a greater authority.

To lower your voice, especially before an interview, try to take some deep belly breaths. It will relax your throat area, which generally contracts and raises the pitch of your voice.

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SOURCE;ENTREPRENEUR

The Secret to Recovering From a Negative Customer Review

Businesses aren’t perfect.

A slipup from a vendor, a shipment gone awry and an inevitable technical error all damage a brand’s reputation. In these situations, customers have the right to be brutal and unforgiving.

Consequently, a negative review can pop up anywhere and haunt a company forever.

Though it's impossible to control what upset customers may say, companies' reaction to the criticism can be tempered.

Related: How to Handle Negative Online Reviews

In its support center for businesses, Yelp offers a helpful document that warns, “contacting reviewers should be approached with care; internet messaging is a blunt tool and sometimes good intentions come across badly.”

Yelp also adds three important points worth remembering:

"1.Your reviewers are your paying customers.

2. Your reviewers are human beings with (sometimes unpredictable) feelings and sensitivities.

3. Your reviewers are vocal and opinionated (otherwise they would not be writing reviews!)."

Of course, this advice can be applied to dealing with negative reviews anywhere on the web, not only on

Yelp.

Avoid getting into a war of words and give disappointed customers an authentic, empathetic and nonconfrontational response. If you are lucky, you might even earn their respect and loyalty.

Below are four tips to remember in order to bounce back from a negative review:

Related: Got a Bad Yelp Review? Here's What to Do

1. Do not hide from your mistakes. Most companies, when hit with harsh feedback, will copy and paste a canned response, then proceed to bury the review deep in Google’s search results. Others will sulk in the shadows, hoping the PR nightmare may eventually blow over.

Unfortunately, neither approach works for the long term. The critic will feel highly undervalued and smart shoppers will always be thorough in their research. Make it a point to acknowledge your failure and to do whatever it takes to make it right instead of making it go away.

Related: How Entrepreneurs Can Cope With Rejection Online

2. Focus on solutions, not excuses. Set your ego aside and make amends by taking responsibility for a user’s poor experience, even if you aren’t truly at fault. Offer a generous apology, which may include a full or partial refund, free gifts and expedited shipping. Then, go the extra mile and provide an outline for an action plan that will permanently fix the root cause of the problem.

For example, you may describe how you will work closer with the quality assurance team, retrain customer service representatives or replace unreliable vendors. This demonstrates that you learned something from the experience and took action so it may never happen again.

Related: Why Crowdsourcing Is the Answer to Business-Software Reviews

3. Recruit consumers' help. Angry customers are not intentionally malicious. In almost all cases, they simply want to be heard and to be treated with dignity and respect. Therefore, invite them to help you build a better business.

Have your clients contribute their ideas for how exactly you can improve your offerings so they may get the most value out of your product and so no one else will feel cheated the way they did. Just remember to do more than listen; deliver on any agreeable suggestions and keep all promises.

4. Work with a clear conscience. After operating in the best interests of your customer and your brand, keep your head held high. There is no reason to feel burdened with a sense of overwhelming guilt or shame that affects morale and performance. At some point, you have to move on and continue delighting more customers.

As your business grows, there will always be at least one annoyed and vocal customer. To ensure that you keep your brand’s reputation intact and that you sleep well at night, be sure to honor every complaint that comes in with a generous response that provides a short-term fix (to win back the customer) and a long-term solution (to earn trust and prevent the issue from happening again).
Share with us any ways of recovering from a Negative Customer Review

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SOURCE;ENTREPRENEUR.COM

There's A Convincing Theory That Goliath, Not David, Was Actually The Underdog

The biblical story of David and Goliath is probably the most well-known underdog story in the world.

Goliath is a giant warrior who battles a much-smaller shepherd boy, David. David shoots him with a stone and a sling right between the eyes, Goliath topples over, and David kills him.

But for centuries, we may have been telling the story wrong. At the very least, we've been leaving out some critical facts that paint a more sympathetic picture of Goliath. In Malcolm Gladwell's book, "David & Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits and the Art of Battling Giants," Gladwell proposes that Goliath may have actually been the underdog, not David.

David and Goliath is "a metaphor for improbable victories," Gladwell explained during a Ted Talk in September. "Why do we call David an underdog? Well, we call him an underdog because he's a kid, a little kid, and Goliath is this big, strong giant. We also call him an underdog because Goliath is an experienced warrior, and David is just a shepherd. But most importantly, we call him an underdog because Goliath is outfitted with all of this modern weaponry, this glittering coat of armor and a sword and a javelin and a spear, and all David has is this sling."

The first mistake history has made when retelling the tale of David and Goliath is to assume that David was a helpless boy who only had a wimpy slingshot to protect himself, Gladwell said.

That's because there were three types of warriors in ancient times: people who fought with slings and archery (David), foot soldiers who were good at up-close combat with swords (Goliath), and people on horseback.
Goliath was a foot soldier; David was a slinger. When put this way, and you note that Goliath and David were fighting from somewhat of a distance, it makes David's weapon choice seem smart. He's good at attacking with accuracy from afar.

It also makes you understand why Goliath was in trouble the moment David whipped out his sling. If David never got close to him, how could he attack and defeat him?

"Goliath is a sitting duck. He doesn't have a chance," Gladwell concludes.
From Gladwell's talk:

[Goliath's] expectation when he challenges the Israelites to a duel is that he's going to be fighting another heavy infantryman. When he says, "Come to me that I might feed your flesh to the birds of the heavens and the beasts of the field," the key phrase is "Come to me." Come up to me because we're going to fight, hand to hand, like this. Saul has the same expectation. David says, "I want to fight Goliath," and Saul tries to give him his armor, because Saul is thinking, "Oh, when you say 'fight Goliath,' you mean 'fight him in hand-to-hand combat,' infantry on infantry."

But David has absolutely no expectation. He's not going to fight him that way. Why would he? He's a shepherd. He's spent his entire career using a sling to defend his flock against lions and wolves. That's where his strength lies. So here he is, this shepherd, experienced in the use of a devastating weapon, up against this lumbering giant weighed down by a hundred pounds of armor and these incredibly heavy weapons that are useful only in short-range combat. Goliath is a sitting duck. He doesn't have a chance.

Read more: http://www.businessinsider.com/malcolm-gladwell-goliath-was-the-underdog-not-david-2014-6#ixzz35IQihOKU

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SOURCE;BUSINESS INSIDER

Star Investor Shares 15 Unconventional Lessons For Aspiring Entrepreneurs

On Wednesday, Shana Fisher, managing partner of High Line Venture Partners, spoke to a crowd of aspiring entrepreneurs at Y Combinator's Startup School in New York City.

Fisher is highly renowned as one of the earliest investors in companies including Pinterest, ShopHers, Makerbot, Vine, and Refinery29.

Fisher mentioned that she has often been told she gives founders surprising advice, which she outlined in her talk.

Here are some of the unconventional lessons she offers entrepreneurs:

Take as much time as you need. A few years ago, Fisher would have advised startup founders to launch their product as soon as possible. Now, she realizes it's not smart to rush products. She says, "If it takes a year to get it right, take a year."

In today's competitive environment, with so many companies striving for attention, it's much more important to have a quality product that customers truly love. Fisher points out that it takes Pixar five years to make a movie, and that's why they are the best.

Make mistakes early. Of course, everyone makes mistakes, and they will be part of the story of how they grow. However, it's better to experiment and make mistakes during the first few stages of a startup, so people can easily correct their failures and learn from them. The worst source of stress is when mistakes occur during a critical time.

Nobody can predict success. Fisher notes that most people initially weren't interested in the companies she funded, even though they ended up becoming wildly successful. Even investors can't always predict what's going to do well, because they tend to be personal and subjective in what they like. When an idea is so new or revolutionary that nobody can evaluate it, those are the times when great things happen.

Don't focus on raising money for the short term. When people think about their "startup runway," which is the amount of money they need to get their company off the ground, they tend to think about raising money that will last for several months. However, Fisher advises people to figure out how to get as far as they can with the money they have. Fisher says, "I don't like people raising money for runway. I want people raising money to make sure this thing happens by any means."

You control your destiny when you control your money. The two ways to control money is through raising it and making it. Most early-stage startups raise money from external funding. However, Fisher uses the metaphor of the equinox, which is the tipping point for when you have to start making money.

There is no greater value in what you do than when people are willing to pay for it. As a founder, you can't get stuck in your phase of simply having potential — at some point, you need to cross the equinox and start bringing real money in.

Target the investors who haven't made deals in a while. You should look at the last couple of deals an investor makes. If they haven't invested in a while, they will probably have a more open mind and will be in a better headspace for your idea. Be strategic about who you talk to.

It's not always a good idea to have cofounders. Fisher likes to see people who can go the distance with their company, and sometimes that means being a single founder is the better choice. You don't always have to follow convention.

Don't overlap skills with other people in your company. If you have a similar skillset as your cofounder or other high-position people, it will end up being redundant. In startups, you have to critically think about how many people you truly need.

You're not creating a product, you're creating a team. Fisher warns, "If you don't take care of managing your team, it's going to come over you like a tidal wave." Most people who lead startups don't know how to manage people. In Fisher's words, it's really important to perfect how you manage them — one by one.

Hire one person first, and then perfect the way you will work with that person before hiring another. If you really learn how to hire and retain people, nobody will ever want to kick you out of your position as CEO. Fisher recommends the SCARF method for learning how to be a better leader.

Watch out for the dreaded question, "Can I talk to you for a minute?" When employees are trying to take you aside to ask about their role in the company or suggest new ideas, it is a major warning sign that you're not giving your employees enough attention. The only reason they would need to go out of their way to talk to you would be if you aren't managing people well. If you see yourself hearing this phrase over and over, you need to step back and figure out what's happening.

Diversity of thought is crucial. If you look around and the people in your company all look the same, you probably don't have enough viewpoints in your company. Find the best person for each job, but also think about bringing different people into the company, even if you have to train them. Working with people who don't think like you is one of the best decisions you can make.

Use the great cosmos as inspiration. We don't understand the edge of the observable universe yet. In the same way, there is no limit to what you can create. Fisher loves to see breakthrough ideas and believes that people truly are going to achieve as big as they dream.

She doesn't want entrepreneurs wasting time making "just another app." Rather, she wants you to do something meaningful. Don't always look for patterns, because they'll simply lead you to things you've seen before.

Stop striving for "great design." These days, everyone seems to be using the same CSS template for their websites. Of course it makes them clean and beautiful, but Fisher reminds people that they don't always have to look like everyone else. She also believes that working on design should always come last.

Fisher warns that startup founders often get trapped in the skin-deep appearance of a product and that they don't worry enough about the breakthrough they're trying to achieve underneath. In the past, she has funded a lot of companies that didn't look good, because she knew that the iceberg of the product was more important than the surface. In her words, "We're all ready for a new look."

Lose perspective. A lot of startup founders lose perspective in other areas of their life, like their family time or health, as they become more and more consumed with their company. However, this isn't entirely a negative thing, as long as it isn't for a long period of time. When you lose perspective, she says, you enter a stage where you can do superhuman things.

Realize that finding a job is the easier path to take.  If you wanted to make money and have an easy life, you could simply work for another company. However, if you are inspired and want to dream big, you need to recognize that startups are really hard. Fisher says, "If you're gonna do it, you gotta go for it, and that's what I want to see."

Read more: http://www.businessinsider.com/shana-fishers-advice-for-entrepreneurs-2014-6#ixzz35INF65ag

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SOURCE;BUSINESS INSIDER

Will the Apple iWatch replace traditional watches?

Wearable revolution in the making

The day Steve Jobs died weighed heavily on Apple fans the world over. The iPod, iPad, iPhone, and iTunes were all revolutionary developments in the tech world that elevated Apple from its moribund ways in the early 90s into the stratosphere of the 21st century.

Since Jobs’s passing, Apple enthusiasts continue to lie in wait wondering what else Apple can introduce that’s going to fundamentally impact human behavior.

Disruptive technology is the bane of any long-standing traditional industry. When something new unexpectedly comes along that excites the user base, it shakes up the status-quo. It’s no surprise, then, that rumors of an “iWatch” have begun to seep out, raising the eyebrows of traditional watchmakers.  Just how disruptive would an iWatch be to the more traditional wristwatch industry, where more than a billion wristwatches are sold every year?

I wear a wristwatch, but my iPhone tells me the time when I want it to. I find myself spending a great deal more time with my iPhone than I ever do with my watch. What could an iWatch provide me with that my iPhone or iPad doesn’t already do? Reviewing the history of the digital watch, you come across these fun developments:  Seiko’s first LCD, Casio’s calculator watch, Seiko’s TV watch, Timex’s Data Link 150 — all of these have come and gone, all essentially replaced by greater advancements in digital technology.

Apple’s Chief Executive, Tim Cook, is under pressure to deliver some bold new products by the end of 2014 to beef up Apple’s aging product line. Apple hasn’t delivered on any new product since the iPad’s debut back in 2010. What else could Apple add to the wristwatch (or smartwatch)  that consumers don’t already have?

Wearable sensor technology

Wearable tech might still be a fad these days, but it’s the future for a number of companies looking to create ways for technology to augment our everyday experiences.

Nice article #wearable technology hitting a tipping point. Like ref to most prolific sensor on phones: the camera. http://t.co/F8ATsDydc6
— Corey Wilson-Wirth (@corey_ww) April 22, 2014

Apple’s foray into wearable technology has prompted it to invest in the biotech sector — in particular, sensor technology. With a reported 100 + product designers at work on the iWatch, the features that are currently under consideration include enabling users to make calls, displaying the identity of incoming callers, and checking map coordinates, according to this Bloomberg article.

It could also include integrated sensors for monitoring aspects your health, such as your heartbeat, or biotech features that will help you sleep better. Apple is developing a new health-related app called “Healthbook,” and according to 9to5, it will be part of iOS 8 and will be reliant on the iWatch. One mobile health executive told Reuters that Apple has aspirations beyond wearable devices and is even considering a full health and fitness services platform modeled on its App Store.

Traditional luxury watchmakers respond: is iWatch a threat?

Suffice it to say, with Apple wanting to break into the billion dollar smartwatch marketplace, more traditional players in the watch market have their own opinions on the move. For starters, Swiss watchmaker Swatch has registered its own trademark with the iSwatch and according to Serena Chieseura, Director of Communication for the Swatch Group, the company believes there is a “high risk of confusion between the two products.”

This wouldn’t be the first time that Apple got into hot water over trademark infringement.
Of course we don’t yet officially know if Apple will call their product the iWatch, but it most certainly would face potential legal challenges if it does. Southern California-based fine watch purveyor Westime isn’t intimidated by Apple’s investment. “Westime is expanding and finding that our industry is still in high demand.

The iWatch does bring some concern, but if you put a fine watch next to this new technology, you will see that the consumer buying fine watches is not the same consumer that would purchase an iWatch,” said Greg Simonian, the president of Westime.

It brings up a more important point about those who still value timepieces as the original fine pieces of jewelry that they are. It was Peter Henlein, a clockmaker out of Nuremberg, Germany, in the early 16th century who is attributed as the inventor of the first pocketwatch. Today, traditional wrist-watch aficionados can still find each other on various social media channels like this Pinterest Watches Lover board.

Cristiano Ronaldo wearing #Jacob

Simonian told me that fine watches are purchased for their quality and for their aesthetics as watches, not for their digital functionality. He noted, “smartwatches and fine watches are inherently different, so for our purposes, we will continue to provide high quality service to customers who are looking for fine watches, not new tech.”

Or take it from Philippe Léopold-Metzger, chief executive of jewelry and watchmaker, Piaget, who told the New York Times, “We’re arriving at a stage where people are getting tired of technological machines, because I think they are invasive. If I go out at night or am invited to a dinner, I don’t take my phone with me.”

Wearable competition between two giants

Apple’s splash into wearable technology will also increase competition with that other 800-pound gorilla, Google. Google has made its computing device, Google Glass, available in fits and starts to the public at large while trying to avoid more PR imbroglios involving glassholes. Owners of Glass can snap pics, shoot video, and connect with email, among other tasks, but Apple is no stranger to disrupting already-mature markets.

The iPhone virtually reinvented the smartphone overnight with record sales thanks to Apple’s unique style and design. Tim Cook needs to find a new product to counteract slower sales of the iPhone. Coming up with a new watch that captures the imagination of millions of consumers will test Apple’s design strategists. If the iWatch successfully merges fashion with product design it just might quadruple the size of the watch business.

As far as an iWatch is concerned, I’m in no rush. Right now, I can feel my heart beat, I know what time it is,
and I’m taking a brief respite from opening my email. I could use a break from staring at my computer screen though.

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Source;technorati.com

10-Year-Old Boy-Genius is One of the Youngest High School Graduates Ever

Like many 10-year-olds, Tanishq Abraham harbors dreams of one day becoming president of the United States (and a scientist and a doctor and curing cancer).

Unlike his peers, however, Abraham just received a personalized letter from the White House congratulating him on a rather singular achievement: he is one of the youngest people in the world to graduate from high school.

Abraham, who was admitted to the high-IQ society Mensa at age four, celebrated the accomplishment bedecked in a cap and gown at a special ceremony last weekend thrown by his parents and attended by roughly 200 friends and family members.

“The way my brain works is that when you give me something, information about that topic comes into my mind," the Sacramento, CA resident told the AP. "I don't know what it is, but that's how it is for me."

Related: How a Teenage Entrepreneur Built a Startup on Bitcoin Riches

In a speech at the ceremony, Abraham said “it’s been a rough and bumpy ride, but I reached my destination early.” He thanked his parents for their unfailing support. “My mom recognized my intellectual talent when I was only a few months old,” he said. “I’m extremely humbled by those who have been inspired by me,”

Abraham concluded, whereupon his 8-year-old sister, Tiara -- who is also a Mensa member -- honored him by singing a medley of Somewhere Over the Rainbow and What a Wonderful World.

Abraham, who was home-schooled, graduated from high school with -- you guessed it -- a 4.0 average, and has been taking classes at a local Sacramento community college since March. He expects to graduate from a four-year university by 12 or 13, according to the TodayShare

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Source:entrepreneur.com